I woke up in the middle of the night, around 3:00 am, and i could not go back to sleep at all! I was just lying there in the bed, when something in my spirit was pushing me to get my bible. I began flipping through, unsure of what exactly it was that I was searching for, until I landed on Psalm 37:4 which reads: "Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you all your heart's desires."
When I read this scripture, I immediately thought back on a conversation that my friend Sophia and I were having on Facebook. I was concerned that while I was spending time in the presence of God by reading, praying and worshiping, I wasn't fully IN the presence of God. Yes, I was doing his work, but was I really taking the time to stop and listen to what He had to say to me? Was I taking the time to make sure that God was the first and only solution to any and every problem that came tumbling my way? Am I striving to be more and more like Christ in my daily walk? Or, was I simply a Christian who had a great "confessional" theology, but was lacking something deeper in her "functional" theology?
I didn't want to be that Christian. God has done so much for me, and continues to do so much for me, that I could not bear the idea of simply talking about Him. God is so worthy of being at the forefront of all of our conversations, however, I can't be satisfied by just talking about him. I want to talk to Him! After all, he's the best dad anyone can ever ask for. I love to share the greatness of God with anyone who bothers to lend an ear, but I love talking to Him just as much! To hear him speak into my life and teach me more of His will is wonderful! However, it's hard to hear from God when other things demand your attention.
So, I prayed about that. It's a prayer that I have been seeking God about for nearly a week now, after one of my brothers decided it was best for him to delete his Facebook account in order to have more time to be available to God. Well, I wanted to know what aspects of my life could be removed so that I could better serve God as well. Although God is still working on his response to that question, he has begun to show me little pieces of his will.
For one thing, i'm definitely cutting back on phone time. My mother didn't pay my phone bill this month, and at first I was upset by that. However, as the days passed by, it may have been one of the best things for me right now. I text all day! I had Facebook as this little blue app and was constantly updating statuses and uploading the latest pictures via Facebook mobile. But how much of that time could have been spent with God? How often would I leave that text unopened, and go seek more of God in his word? Seldom, if ever. Having a phone wasn't all bad though. I used to send out good morning texts to all of my friends with a scripture or quote so everyone would have a little nugget of encouragement for the day. When I turn it back on, I will be more mindful of how much time I spend using it, so that I always have time for God.
I'm seeking God first in everything. If there is anything that He thinks i should cut down on, or remove completely from my life, let it be. For it is not my will, but the will of my father. Even if he were to call me to eliminate something that I love, say volleyball for instance, I will do it because I know it will be for his glory in the end, and that's what we live for. We live to give God glory.
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